April 12, 2009
Breastfeeding in public? No problem
A survey of 20 nursing mums shows they're comfortable doing so as it helps to bond with baby
By Debbie Yong
A mother who was breastfeeding in a reputable Japanese eatery in Orchard was asked to leave the premises. That incident was witnessed last week by engineer Frank Chong, 31, who recounted it on an online forum on SPH portal Stomp.
He was dining there when he heard the head waiter telling a woman at the next table to stop breastfeeding because another family had complained.
Mr Chong said that when she refused to comply, the restaurant manager asked the family to leave and added that they would not have to foot the bill.
Said Mr Chong in his post: 'I'm positive that I heard someone (from the complaining family) say: 'Breastfeeding in public? Maybe she can feed the husband as well.' This not the best part, this sentence came from a woman.'
When The Sunday Times contacted him, he said: 'I know Singapore is still a conservative society but not to this extent. Breastfeeding is very normal and helps to increase the bond between baby and mother.'
His son, now nine years old, was breastfed as an infant when the family was based in Australia.
Was the unpleasant Orchard incident a one-off?
It would seem so, going by a check with 20 mothers who breastfeed. Some said they can even do so while walking along a busy street or inside a crowded train. This is made possible by a growing range of nursing tops on sale, from $30. Nursing aprons and sarongs offer the most discretion.
Some mothers, like Ms Lena Goh, 31, make their own by cutting holes out of old tank tops. It helps too if the mother is confident about breastfeeding.
Said Ms Goh, vice-president of the Breastfeeding Mothers Support Group (BMSG): 'The more confident you feel, the more comfortable your baby will be, and the less he will twitch. This will help draw less attention from passers-by.'
Analyst Celine Low, 32, who has breastfed her eight-month-old son from day one, said she was initially hesitant about doing so in public, but now shrugs off the occasional onlooker.
'As he grows older, he tends to be more fidgety so I try to feed him at home before going out, but sometimes if he's hungry, I just have to feed him,' she said.
It helps to have a supportive husband who acts as her shield, she added.
Most shopping malls have nursing rooms for breastfeeding mothers. But their proximity to toilets is a turn-off for some. There are also complaints that the rooms are often located on high floors and in a corner, and are hard to find.
Said Ms Angeline Wee, 42, president of the BMSG: 'You wouldn't eat in a toilet - why should you feed your baby in one?'
She noted that public perception of breastfeeding as 'indecent exposure' has lessened over the years.
A survey of 766 mothers by research firm The Nielsen Company in February found that 41 per cent of them were breastfeeding in their babies' first year, up from 30 per cent in a similar survey in 2006.
Ms Wee's advice to the public is that if it makes them uncomfortable, they should just look away, or move to another table. She added that perhaps restaurants could provide napkins or scarves to those who breastfeed.
Ms Low said it pays to be upfront - 'tell the waiter you are going to breastfeed and you prefer somewhere more private'.
Many restaurants and cafes said they have not had any problems stemming from patrons who breastfeed. None provides special provisions or designated corners.
'We will ask if the breastfeeding mum minds sitting in a quieter corner,' said a Starbucks spokesman.
Ms Florence Tan, 32, who breastfed all four of her children, now aged between one and nine years old, said restaurants or shops do not see any particular need to cater to breastfeeding mothers.
She links this to 'space constraints and perhaps because malls usually have a nursery room'.
Many mothers agree that the onus is also on breastfeeding mothers to exercise discretion.
Ms Wee advises inexperienced mothers to pack along a scarf to counter prying eyes.
Said Ms Tan: 'If you do it appropriately, you should not be inviting strong objections. Respect is key to people accommodating you, so you should begin by respecting others.'
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